Bobbing Along

The morning after the 2016 Election, I sat at the airport awaiting a flight to Chicago. I was numb. I was heartbroken. And I was frightened beyond belief at the results of the previous day.

There was an eerie quiet amongst us, those passengers waiting to board. I could say that we all felt impending doom but that would be neither fair nor correct. Perhaps the quiet reflected a competing sense of relief that this most contentious of elections was finally over.

I do know that when the overhead monitor began to display Clinton’s concession speech, many stood attentively in front of the screen, each one somber. Respectful. Silent. I don’t believe for a minute that all of them were supporters of her campaign, yet even if their interest was based only on curiosity, their respect was profound.

That respect moved me to tears. If the behavior and dialogue that was espoused by our now President during the course of his campaign served as any indication, respect will certainly not be a hallmark of this new administration. Of this, I am sure.

Let me be clear on something: I am not a die-hard, vote-the-party-line person. I do have some lines-in-the-sand issues that inform my choices but I also know that sand shifts. I am open to other ideas (even if I do manage to argue my opposing points). I have occasionally been known to change my opinion (very occasionally but still…).

This election, however, was particularly difficult for me. You see, I was raised by a man whose words inflicted pain. My siblings and I have worked all our lives to heal the wounds inflicted by one bully, our father. The mental and emotional wounds will never be fully erased; scars will always remain.

I know only too well the damage that is done when words are used to control. When words are used to humiliate. When words are used to demean and diminish. And I know just how difficult it is to rise up against such words. It has taken me the better part of my lifetime to find my own voice and my abuse wasn’t on a public scale. No one recorded it. It was not displayed and discussed on the news. No one had an opportunity to stand up against it.

As a nation, we should have stood up against this bully who is now our new president.

But we did not.

For those of you who overlooked his words, please understand why I could not. Please understand why I cannot still. Please understand that words matter and for the life of me, I cannot understand why his words didn’t matter to you. To everyone.

To those of you who may feel that I am being disrespectful here, I answer this: Were my path to cross with the new president, I would behave respectfully. That is right and fair. He, however, will have to earn my respect. After all of his words, which were hurtful to so many people, I think that is also right. And also fair.

Words have consequences.

The words we use speak to our character.

Choose them wisely, Mr. President.

Choose them wisely.